Funny how life turns out a little bit different than you imagined it growing up. Along the way you get distracted by raging hormones or make a series of compromises until you end up somewhere completely different. Yet your heart still silently yearns for your childhood dreams, doesn’t it? I heard some say that we often tell ourselves “rational lyze” to keep ourselves in our comfort zone, keep us from moving into the unknown of our dreams and realizing our full potential. We rationalize ourselves right into the picture perfect lives society or our family has prescribed for us. We’ve settled down or just plain settled for less than our dreams. And here we get stuck until we wake up one morning and don’t recognize the care-worn face looking back at us in the mirror.

Not that we have bad lives. Far from it. I wouldn’t for a moment of Indiana Jones glory trade my family and friends away. But other aspects of my life? Heck yeah!

So what’s stopping us? What keeps us stuck? Even if we have built a life we love, but inside crave more, what keeps us from chasing rainbows?

We get stuck when we resist following our intuition, our heart. This comes out in two main places. First are the rational lies we tell ourselves that really only mask our ego based fears. We repeatedly talk ourselves out of pursuing our dreams for what we “think” are good reasons: I have kids, I have bills, I have responsibilities, and I SHOULD do such and such. Think about this for a moment. Where are you “shoulding” yourself? How many of those “shoulds” are really just excuses because you are afraid of making the changes you know you need to?

The second place is in not making a decision. We respond to situations reactively instead of proactively. Here’s how I learned this lesson big time. I was working in a spa a few years ago and kept hearing that it was time to go out on my own, start my own healing work. I kept stalling. The guidance became more insistent, but because I didn’t know how I was to accomplish this, I kept on resisting. A series of odd events conspired and forced me out. I was shocked, to say the least. I was no longer in a position to proactively decide the course of my work. I had to react to the situation instead. Had I listened to my guidance I may have been better prepared to run my own practice. Instead I was thrown into it. It all turned out for the best, of course, but I did it the hard way.

Watching Indiana Jones for probably the 50^th time last night with my 5 year old brought back all the longing for adventure I had when I was young. But I saw it differently this time. As my husband often lovingly reminds me, I’m not a very rational person. I think this has worked to my advantage. Since I opened to fully living by my intuition, really listening to what my heart has to say about things, look where I am. Mild mother and wife by all appearances, my adventures take place in the realm of souls. So I don’t have that sexy fedora, but I take myself and others exploring the great wilderness within and solving the puzzles presented by the soul. Booby traps are those of the ego. I spend many hours a day studying and teaching the ancient mysteries. I am Indiana Jones of the internal worlds! How cool is that!

So keep chasing your rainbows. Keep moving closer to where you are guided. Learn to recognize when you are resisting and see it for what it really is. Before you know it, you too will be living your dreams!

So what’s the Law of Polarity? We live in a dualistic dimension. Everything that exists has its opposite in existence as well. This is an up and a down, dark and light, and so on. Taken further, the opposite exists simultaneously in time and space. That means that for every question we ask, the answers you seek are already manifest. Every idea that you have already exists with how to make it happen. There is no problem you can have that does not have the solution already available. It then becomes a simple matter of shifting your awareness to allow the solutions to come.

Here’s how to use this: Think about what you really want, your fantasy, and your dream. To move an idea into reality, you need to answer yes to two questions: Am I able? (We are capable of anything, so this should always be yes)  Am I willing? You must be willing to step out of what you know into divine guidance.

The second question is usually what trips us up. We are asked to let go of our stored knowledge and trust in our divine guidance system. We must be willing to give up those things of a lower frequency in order to gain something of a higher frequency. We must have faith that the “what” already exists and the “how” will be revealed.

Once you can answer “yes”, Neagle gives us this: DACAG

Decide (fully commit): this leads to a change in perception. The change in perception leads to an Awareness of the next step, the knowing that you need to do something and what that something is. These steps lead to change. Change leads to Adapting. Adapting leads to Growth into a space beyond where your beginning awareness could have taken you. Your continued use of this cycle will lead you to the full expression of you.

“If it is meant to be, the way will appear.”

“yeah, but you still need to take action to help bring it into being.”

“And don’t forget to be in alignment with what you want. Remember: Intention, Attention, No tension!”

“What if it doesn’t happen? I’ve made commitments!”

We all want to feel like we are master of our own destiny, able to manifest what we need when we need, sometimes through force of will if it comes to it. Then there are those times when, try your hardest, nothing moves. In times of doubt, when I find myself struggling, feeling constriction and resistance, I turn my attention to the energy. What is the energy saying?

Come into a place of calm. Take as long as you need in this. I go to that safe and loving place within myself where I can connect with my Higher Self. Stay there. Once you have allowed that shift, open your eyes and take a moment to notice the inherent abundance around you. It can be simple, like the thriving plants in the garden and the sunshine that is given so freely. Maybe its the knowing that in this moment you and your family have a home and the basics of life plus some. Perhaps its the abundance of love you give and receive. What does that feel like, that abundance? It feels good, doesn’t it? Effortless, even? Practice this until it does feel effortless to be in the space of abundance.

When we put aside all the “shoulds” about manifesting, it comes down to this truth: the reality we perceive outside ourselves is a reflection of our inner reality. So turn your focus inward. Simply turn up the dial on your abundance meter and allow your consciousness to shift into the energy of abundance. If there is action to take, you will have the clarity to know what that is. Then just move with it.

It is easy to think that if this changed, or that was different, or if I could just get away for a while, everything would change. But it is the change within that creates the new experiences. To look to the outside for the change is like looking in a puddle for the whale. Its just not the right place.

Mediation this week has focused on noticing the internal language we all have. Is it positive thoughts, critical, negative, draining?  How much energy are we giving to these thoughts? When you are able to detach yourself from your thoughts and watch them pass like clouds in the sky, you begin to notice where you are putting your mental energy. Once you notice this, you are faced with a choice. Am I going to continue this way, or do I decide to try something else?

It didn’t take me very long to decide that some shifts were needed in my internal language. I was sitting in the parking lot of Kinko’s, getting ready to make copies of a flier I had created about my newest service. Yet up came the internal criticism. “You can’t do that! Who would want to see you? You’re not good enough” and on and on and on it went until I was nearly in tears. Then I remembered the work of this week. Right there I told myself to shut up. I decided turn that energy to positive thoughts instead. I know this will be a process. But, like the first time you stand up to a bully and they are speechless, so too has my internal nay-sayer been stunned for the moment. I know more work is needed, that I will need to continue to stand up to my own inner bully. But it’s a start.

Having been working with a personal trainer for a couple of months now I was becoming familiar with the workings of my body from moment to moment. My meditation practice, however, had been focusing on guided meditations in order to bring clear messages. All mediation is wonderful and beneficial, but this shift brought to my awareness just how much of my mental power was spent elsewhere. I was either worried about the future, mulling over the past, or thinking about other people. It wasn’t until the end of the week that I was spending a fair bit of the mediation in the present moment. And it was in those moments that I could feel  a complete calm wash over me.

I am a firm believer that our body holds the records of our emotions, thoughts, and experiences. Because I was also fighting a bit of a cold this past week I decided to test out a technique I have been working on. This technique has helped a lot with my shoulder pain (due to the repetitive motions in my massage work). From my meditative state I turn my attention inside, to the area of discomfort. In this case, my sore throat and stuffy nose. I allow the message my body is trying to send me come through. I acknowledge out loud what my body has told me, thank my body for bringing me this message and then, while drawing healing energy into the area, re-frame the message into a positive affirmation which I then speak out loud and with conviction at least three times.

The message from my cold went something like this: It goes against your heart to speak your truth with anger and resentment. (In my coaching we are working on speaking my truth, finding my voice, but with in doing so I was also bringing up a lot of unresolved anger.) When you speak with anger you will find that your throat will hurt. When you are in conflict (turning that anger towards myself instead of love) about your feelings towards yourself your sinuses will become congested to show you how you are blocking your clear vision/intuition.

I re-framed the messages so say “I speak my truth with love and understanding”, “I love myself and allow others to love me too.”

My colds normally last 7 days or so. This one lasted 2 days.

At first glance it may seem that I am being selfish, taking so much time for myself when there are sick children to tend to. Here’s what the miracle has been. Not only am I balancing these activities, but I am not getting as angry when I am interrupted. I am moving with ease from activity to activity in a way I haven’t before. And, more importantly, my boys have supported me in this and feeling that their needs are being met as well.

So what is making the difference? “Ghandi taught that health is to be sought primarily in the realm of the spirit.” (Baptiste) Turning our focus to our spiritual health then allows us to shift our perspectives and attitudes about life. Our outer world being a reflection of our inner world, we begin to create our life from a healthier origin. That I am beginning to navigate from a more peaceful place inside is already starting to reflect in my outer world. Struggle happens,  colds are caught. Healing and transformation happen by staying focused on the present.

My greatest fear is my own vioce, my strength, the big red dragon that encompasses all I am and have the potential to be. All my life I have given my voice over to others in the belief that if I let my real self out I would be attacked, just as a dragon would be hunted and killed. A bit dramatic I admit. However, when you have been patterned from you infancy to believe something, changing that belief can be as scary as facing a dragon.

The path to facing this fear, to befriending my personal dragon, is my biggest challenge. I know that I have something important to say, a wonderful gift to give in the form of my healing work, yet how effective can I be at this work if I cannot heal myself? Thus this transformation. I am baby stepping into being able to express my dragon in a loving way. Dragons, in lore, are a source of power, magic and great wisdom. Imagine the possibilities if I can merge with this aspect of myself. How will my life transform?

How would your life transform if you were to face what you most fear?

That said, in order to support my clients and friends who come to me for guidance in related matters, I need to be walking my talk. Here I am making a commitment to myself to move forward by going within. As the days progress I hope to share with you my challenges and victories, insights and tips. I am actively inviting in a stronger, wiser and more balanced version of myself. I welcome you to join me on this journey.